Hot Take #3 The world is not built for introverts.
Yup, you read it right! The world as it looks today isn’t designed to accommodate introverts.
And that’s a bit fucked up given that recent studies found that half the population are introverts. Other studies have said a third of the population. That’s one out of every two or three people. And they don’t need to be changed, these introverted people. They do need to be accommodated and nurtured so that they make the most of their natural talents, so they learn the skills that they need to flourish in extroverted schools and workplaces. But that’s different from changing who they are.
Why I am saying that the world is not being built for introverted learners?
The Extrovert Ideal
Decades of research on introversion and "highly sensitive" people show why many classrooms and working environments are far from ideal for introverts. Often, they aren't even friendly. Since the days of Dale Carnegie, sociability, confidence, and polished verbal style have been considered ideal features to cultivate in students and workers. Shy, reserved, or solitary aren't often compliments.
The Extrovert Ideal is a phrase that describes the way that society rewards those with extroverted tendencies and leadership. In Susan Cain’s words from her book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking,
“We live with a value system that I call the Extrovert Ideal—the omnipresent belief that the ideal self is gregarious, alpha, and comfortable in the spotlight...”.
Although the Extrovert Ideal may only seem important to introverts, it should concern anyone who cares about how the world treats those who function differently. Society should accept introverts and extroverts for who they are. As attractive of a trait as extroversion is, it should not be an oppressive standard. If no space is made for introverts, then society will lose people who crave solitude that gives them time to formulate ideas without distraction, people who rely on their inner compasses, not external affirmation, and realistic listeners would can shape the world with passion and strength.
Life contexts ( such as school, or workplace) favour the extroverts.
Maybe what I am about to say will sound familiar to you. Be it in school or the workplace, people are very often put in the situation of contributing by participating in Socratic discussions, being evaluated by specific grades and KPIs, being on the spot and presenting their projects, ideas, and opinions for a bigger or smaller crowd and so on. Most introverts feel uncomfortable having to speak in a group and want to work by themselves instead of being paired up into groups. They also need more time to process, filter and reflect on things before forming an opinion or making a decision.
To put it in simple words, people often have different skill sets based on their tendency towards introversion or extraversion ( more about it here, and here on Social Comparison Theory).
So, the world ends up becoming this place where introverted people learn that they have to act like extroverts.
Collaboration kills creativity.
The research psychologist Anders Ericsson measured what makes the best expert performers - musicians, athletes, chess players, college students etc. - perform. What he discovered is that the strongest predictor of skill performance is solitary practice. What is so magical about solitude? He discovered that in many fields, it’s only when you are alone that you can engage in deliberate practice. When you practice deliberately, you identify the tasks or knowledge that are just out of reach, strive to upgrade your performance, monitor your progress and revise accordingly without being distracted by a group. Not to mention that studies have shown that the performance gets worse as the group size increases. Or Marvin Dunnete’s research which proved that deliberate practice produces more and better ideas than group brainstorming. Just saying.
Additionally, in contrast with the push for group work and sociability in schools, companies and leadership programs, we have the actual working habits of some of the top corporate leaders and inventors, like Stephen Wozniak, co-founder of Apple, who were introverts and achieved performance by working alone. Still, the world doesn’t seem to accommodate this need. Some statistics (from US):
70 percent of employees now work in "open floor plans" in which no worker has any private workspace.
The amount of space per employee in U.S. workplaces shrank from 500 square feet in the 1970s to 200 square feet in 2010.
A majority of U.S. 4th and 8th grade teachers surveyed in 2002 preferred to have students work collaboratively.
Hope these ideas gave you some food for thought. And next time you have to design, organize or create something, think about how you can accommodate both introverts, extroverts and ambiverts and give each of them the chance to shine through their skills :)
🧰 Tools to play with
Resources for Companies & what’s inside:
Inclusive Meetings Checklist
Personality Styles Tool
Free Trait Agreement
Taming Conflict Tool
Mixed-Temperament Team Communications Tool
Resources for Schools & Educators & what’s inside:
Strategy Guide for QuietPower Clubs: 5 Essential Tips
Quiet-Friendly Comment Guide
How Neurobiology Shapes Temperament: Classroom Activities
Quiet Engagement Rubric
Quiet Ambassador Goal-Setting Guide
📚️ Recommendations worth exploring
➡️ To read on your commute to work
How do teachers feel about their quiet students? Why do so many high-functioning people look back at high school as the worst time of their lives—and why do we accept this as normal? And many other important questions & answers on the topic.
Introverts at work – 12 reasons why your company needs them.
Understanding the idea of the Extrovert Ideal. Observations from an introvert in a world that enjoys the company of extroverts.
Society has a cultural bias towards extroverts.
Embracing unique strengths: Why introverts make great leaders?
➡️ For the bookworms: Quiet by Susan Cain
I’ve read this book for the same reason most people read this book: I am an introvert (or to be correct, I have a tendency towards introversion). And I have always been an introvert. But it was only a few years ago when I started to see this as a gift.
In the book, Susan Cain uses facts, statistics and her own case studies to make us aware of the gift of being introverted and shows that introverts are greatly successful and powerful, not in spite of their introversion, but because of it.
This book is interesting, whether you are an introvert, extrovert, ambivert or anywhere on this spectrum. Because if you’re not an introvert, odds are you know and love one ☺️
➡️ Binge-eating while binge-watching
In a culture where being social and outgoing are prized above all else, it can be difficult, even shameful, to be an introvert. But, as Susan Cain argues in this passionate talk, introverts bring extraordinary talents and abilities to the world and should be encouraged and celebrated.
What stayed with me, are the last 3 calls to action for all younger or older students:
“We need to be teaching kids to work together, for sure, but we also need to be teaching them how to work on their own. This is especially important for extroverted children too. They need to work independently because that is where deep thought comes from in part.
“Go to the wilderness. Be like Buddha, and have your own revelations. I’m not saying that we all have to go off now and build our own cabins in the woods and never talk to each other again, but I am saying that we could all stand to unplug and get inside our own heads a little more often.
“Take a good look at what’s inside your own suitcase and why you put it there. So extroverts, maybe your suitcases are also full of books. Or maybe they’re full of champagne glasses or skydiving equipment. Whatever it is, I hope you take these things out every chance you get and grace us with your energy and your joy. But introverts, you being you, you probably have the impulse to guard very carefully what’s inside your own suitcase. And that’s okay. But occasionally, just occasionally, I hope you will open up your suitcases for other people to see, because the world needs you and it needs the things you carry.”
➡️ For podcasts lovers
As the star of Pretty in Pink, 16 Candles, and The Breakfast Club, Molly Ringwald made it cool to be an outsider. But how did a shy, introverted actress like Molly find fame in Hollywood? Susan Cain interviews Molly Ringwald about how her personality influences her life onstage and as a parent.
➡️Laugh & learn
🤝Let’s work together!
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